(submitted by Therewasatime1939)
12.12.2011
5.02.2011
4.08.2011
4.05.2011
4.04.2011
Meanwhile, at the Manhattan Museum of Art...
Listen to me!
What?! Who?!
I, Vigo, the Scourge of Carpathia, the Sorrow of Moldavia, command you.
Oh! Command me, lord!
3.28.2011
What if...
Welcome to the next installment of the ‘what if’ scenario of Ghostbusters 2, whereby Vigo the Carpathian’s evil plot to conquer the world succeeds, the Ghostbusters are vanquished and Janosz realizes his ultimate ambition to marry Dana Barrett.
This week, let’s focus on the disciplinary issues that likely cropped up during the joint raising of the child only a demon could love. Certainly some conflict arises when it comes to punishing Viscar (Vigo-Oscar) for domestic transgressions. For the sake of argument, let’s say that at some point during the day, Janosz excuses himself from baby-watching to rummage through Dana’s clothes closet while she’s at work, indulging in the newfound love for cross-dressing.
Upon Janosz’ re-emergence from the bedroom as a chic, fabulous-looking henchman, he finds that Viscar has colored the walls of Dana’s apartment to create a portrait of himself sitting on a Throne of Blood in a Castle of Pain (there wasn’t enough crayon left for the Mountain of Skulls).
For any parent, these would be trying circumstances indeed. But if you were Janosz, would you punish Viscar, or congratulate him on his little triumph of evil doing? If you had already adopted a policy of encouraging your son towards pro-world domination (which would at least spare you the financial stress of having to one day pay for his college education), then punishing him for this would probably be a bit like chastising a young Alicia Keys for singing too well in the shower. Sure it’s a transgression, but reinforcing it negatively could potentially confound Viscar’s destiny. On the other hand, what if Viscar does something like pee in the dishwasher? Janosz probably shouldn’t view it as a sign of great, magical things to come- that’s just a kid being a straight-up s**t.
So then….how to punish Viscar? I sense that in his former life, this man was something of a sadomasochist, what with the whole ‘genocidal maniac’ thing. Spanking him would probably be little more than a congratulatory gesture in this case. Instead, perhaps Janosz could show Viscar the movie ‘Valentine’s Day’ on repeat for the entire afternoon- subjecting him to the sappiest, most painfully awful movie to emerge from the crusty a**hole of Hollywood filmmaking in decades.
3.26.2011
3.24.2011
I await the word, Vigo!
Vigo: I, Vigo, the Scourge of Carpathia
Janosz: I know. You've told me this. The Scourge.
Vigo: the sorrow of Moldavia
Janosz: Sorrows. I've heard all of this, yes.
3.22.2011
Get The Look!
Have you ever thought to yourself, that man Janosz has wicked style? You are in luck! The Upper Vest Side has the costume breakdown here for you.
Today's look:
Where to buy:
3.21.2011
3.15.2011
3.10.2011
3.07.2011
What if...
Welcome to the next installment of the ‘what if’ scenario of Ghostbusters 2, whereby Vigo the Carpathian’s evil plot to conquer the world succeeds, the Ghostbusters are vanquished and Janosz realizes his ultimate ambition to marry Dana Barrett.
When we last left off, Janosz was immersed in domestic affairs, struggling to adapt to the sudden pressures of raising the hybrid Vigo-Oscar, or Viscar for short. Doubtlessly, Dr. Poha finds his loyalty tested as Viscar slowly grows into the powerful magician with shiny gold locks that he is destined to become. But for a moment, let's forego the doubtlessly hilarious disciplinary issues that Janosz is sure to encounter with his demonic foster child, and instead focus on some very key issues that were brought up in the second film itself, particularly Janosz's new found penchant for dressing in women's clothes. As you may recall, Dr. Poha dressed himself in the guise of a sinister nanny whilst kidnapping Oscar from the late Peter Venkman’s apartment. I've always found it curious that Vigo's evil strategy evolved to such bizarre socio-sexual extremes, so much so that I can't help believing that the Carpathian had very little to do with its initial formulation. Yes, folks, I suspect that the nanny card that was played was ALL Janosz.
When it was somehow heard through the ectoplasmic grapevine that Oscar was going to be babysat by the hapless, French bread pizza-loving Jeanine Melnitz and Louis Tully, Vigo summoned his obedient lackey Janosz to the museum to finalize plans for the procurement of said "b-aaay-beee" for a standard demonic possession session. Vigo suggests that they make another go of capturing Oscar with pink slime via the plumbing system, perhaps through Venkman's toilet this time.
Visibly underwhelmed with this suggestion, Janosz offers a counter-proposal, sprawling out on the floor, once more humbling himself before Vigo to gain his favor (after all, it seemed to work when he suggested that he be Vigo's step-dad in the first place). So, as Vigo anxiously awaits Janosz's idea, he is shocked to learn that the kidnapping plan invokes what Janosz refers to as the 'necessity' of crossdressing. Certainly, this must have wiped that smug look clean off of Vigo's face.
Visibly underwhelmed with this suggestion, Janosz offers a counter-proposal, sprawling out on the floor, once more humbling himself before Vigo to gain his favor (after all, it seemed to work when he suggested that he be Vigo's step-dad in the first place). So, as Vigo anxiously awaits Janosz's idea, he is shocked to learn that the kidnapping plan invokes what Janosz refers to as the 'necessity' of crossdressing. Certainly, this must have wiped that smug look clean off of Vigo's face.
"WTF?"
Janosz insists that Vigo hear him out, pulling out the duffle bag that he lugged with him on the bus to the museum. Inside is a nanny outfit that Janosz had long ago stolen from his Aunt Anca's closet, complete with the gray wig she used to wear to hide the fact that she was hideously bald. In Vigo's presence, during what was surely an awkward four minutes, Janosz put on the outfit and femininely walked around the museum a little bit to get into character and make sure the old woman shoes were comfortable. Sensing a socially unpleasant alternative, Vigo quickly agrees that this will do just fine and 'ghostified' Janosz so that he could whisk away on the evening breeze and kidnap Oscar.
After the positive reinforcement of Vigo acquiescing to Janosz’ suggestion, this writer posits that Poha’s drag-queen tendencies probably didn’t stop there, out of necessity of reaffirming the comfort bond that was propagated when he swiped Oscar in the nanny garb . Being left alone in Dana’s apartment for several hours at a time almost definitely would have been conducive towards more experimentation, with Janosz frantically rummaging through her closet to pin down any other attractive garment arrangements. Casual nanny outfits, business nanny, and his personal favorite- the happily-cooking nanny outfit, itself a winning combination of Dana’s cello-playing dress coupled with her prized Paula Dean apron.
That’s right y’all- Janosz built this up to a science, and may truly be considered to be a pioneer in the realm of cross-dressing. That is to say- cross-dressing with demonic intent. Take THAT, Ru Paul!
3.04.2011
3.03.2011
3.01.2011
2.28.2011
2.22.2011
2.21.2011
2.19.2011
Janosztuff
Ghostbusters Exclusive Minimates
Mini Figure 2 Pack
Possessed Janosz and the Statue of Liberty
You can buy this awesome collectible here
2.17.2011
What if...
Did you ever stop to wonder just what may have happened if Vigo’s plan had actually proven successful? Yes, yes, if you consider that question, it may inspire some to say ‘Well, it WASN’T successful so the question is irrelevant’. Let’s suppose for the sake of this Janosz fan site that the positively-slimed Statue of Liberty (which was of course carrying the day-saving Ghostbusters) ended up tripping over that NYPD car on Fifth Avenue instead of crushing it beneath its heel. Lady Liberty would have taken quite a tumble, crushing hundreds of spectators and spilling the Ghostbusters out onto the pavement like discarded slushees. The sight of this would have undoubtedly reinforced the negative vibes of the Tri-State populace and thus- further cemented the hold of the slime fortress which had amassed around the Museum. Inside--where the diabolical ritual was taking place to house Vigo’s spirit in poor Oscar’s tiny body—the experiment would have met with no resistance and come to full fruition at the stroke of midnight.
Okay, so it’s done! Vigo has transmigrated into Oscar, no Ghostbusters have come to salvage New Year’s Eve, and Janosz is now free to marry Dana and raise Vigo-Oscar (Viscar) as the future ruler of the world.
Doesn’t that sound nice?
Well, it wouldn’t have been a total cakewalk, I’m guessing. The happy family would then have to deal with some very practical concerns that Janosz probably hadn’t been anticipating when he made good on his verbal contract with the Sorrow of Moldavia. This hypothetical scenario assumes that early on, Dana realized the futility of opposing Janosz and decided to stick around; after all she couldn’t very well just abandon her son now could she? In his effort to convince Dana of the pros of siding with evil, Janosz touted the advent of a nice apartment and free parking as ‘perks’ to raising Viscar. I don’t know if you’ve ever lived in Manhattan, but landlords are generally hesitant to award free lodgings to every Tom, Dick and Harriet that proclaim their dominion over all of Nature. So, at least in the beginning, Janosz probably ended up having to move in with Dana for some time while they sorted their financial affairs. Having both lost their jobs at the Museum over what was deemed ‘vandalism’ in the viewing gallery that doubled as a satanic marriage chamber; Janosz and Dana have to start completely from scratch. Dana would have had to take back her job with the orchestra full-time, and Janosz would have been left with Viscar during the day.
This arrangement must have proven awkward, to say the least. Having witnessed the dark glory of Vigo’s presence inside the painting, Janosz is now faced with a helpless, drooling incarnation of Vigo that is still learning how to inhabit its own body- and is forced to deal with him for a good 12 hours each day. Is it safe to assume that Janosz perhaps lost a little respect for his master during these trying times? A grown man trying to be subservient to a 12 pound shit-factory would be taxing on ANYONE’s patience. Certainly on many-a-night, Dana must have come home from work, exhausted from playing that damned cello, only to be greeted at the front door by a frustrated Poha, looking at himself and asking “Why am I drippings with poo?”
2.16.2011
2.15.2011
2.11.2011
Take a look- it's not Gainsborough's 'Blue Boy', there. He is Vigo!
Now, lets paint some happy little clouds...
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